CIM Race Recap
First, thanks to everyone who tracked me and sent messages of encouragement and congratulations last weekend. You probably already know that I did not run a sub 3 hour marathon. I came SO close though and ran a 3:01:24. 85 seconds away from goal. Crossing the finish line was a huge mix of emotions and tears, but let’s start from the beginning to how I got there.
We got to Sacramento on Friday afternoon and hit up the expo. Last time I ran CIM, we got there on Saturday and everything felt rushed, so having the extra day was nice. Our hotel was close to the finish line near Capitol Park which was pretty convenient. We had our team shakeout run on Saturday morning. I absolutely love meeting my athletes in person, so it was great to get the group together. Many of them follow each other on social too, so they all enjoyed meeting for the first time and I just love the connections we continue to build with the team. We did a short 2 miles and then all grabbed coffee to iron out a few more things for race day.
The rest of the day was pretty mello. We grabbed lunch and watched a movie in bed before dinner. I tried to do everything the same with respect to nutrition as I did for the Santa Clarita Half. Oatmeal in the morning, turkey sandwich on white bread for lunch, salmon + white rice + zucchini for dinner, and snacking on pretzels, an apple and Nuun throughout the day. I felt good. Unfortunately, on Friday I got my period. It came early again which was so weird, but put me in the same position I was for Grandma’s Marathon (got it two days before the race). I panicked and cried when it came thinking that this was going to unfold in a similar way to Grandma’s, but that quickly went away when I realized that there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it and just tried to focus on what I could control.
The next day I woke up and did my plain bagel with plain, unsalted peanut butter and a banana. I walked over to the Hyatt to meet Kim and Paula so we could head to the buses together. The drive up to the start seemed to take forever (almost an hour) and I think the driver got a little lost, but we made it with about 45 minutes until the gun. We jumped into the porto potty lines and then it was time to get to the start line. Kim ran a 2:58 at St. George in October, so I was excited to run with her since she was shooting for a similar time. My race plan was to stay with the 3:00 pace group through 20 and then race and come in under. When Kim and I got to the start, we quickly found the pace group. I thought she would follow me through and then we would be able to sync up, but she jumped ahead and wasn’t with the group. I moved up with her and we stayed slightly in front of the pace group.
We were both feeling good, exchanging a few words and split times here and there, but staying pretty focused. The miles seemed to fly by. We saw my parents and Ricky at the 10K mark and that was exciting! I love seeing them and it really gets me pumped. Fuel was going down great. Somewhere around mile 11, Kim slowed to take some fuel and I thought she would come up on me, but I never saw her again. I saw Ricky and my parents again at the half mark, which I came into at 1:29:24. Perfect. I knew we were in front of the 3:00 group, but I really wanted to make sure I wasn’t overdoing it and the split confirmed I was in a good place. Gels had been going down well, but I could tell the day was warmer than I wanted, so I made sure to hit up each aid station alternating between water and Nuun.
Mile 14-17 were a bit of a blur, but I knew this was one of the last big hills to fight through (make no mistake there were more hills after this, but it was a big one on the elevation chart). We were headed into the wind during this patch as well. There was a large group well in front of me and only a few people around me, so drafting wasn’t an option. I think I worked a little too hard here, but there were a couple girls next to me who were hitting pace, so I just focused on running with them.
Mile 20 was still solid, but I felt like my body was starting to break down and thus, my mind was following suit. I ran through a water station and a girl offered me some of hers once we passed through. It helped a ton because I felt like I was only able to get in a sip of whatever I grabbed at this point. It was like I was throwing the cup at my mouth and just trying to get whatever I could. I tried to stay with her and managed to stick to a small pack for the next mile. At mile 21, a woman came up on my shoulder and said, “Come with me. Strong women. Let’s go.” Try as I might, I couldn’t mimic her pace or enthusiasm that she had bottled up and saved for later in the race - she appeared to be having the race that I dreamed of. Feeling that strong that late to pass up runners as quickly as she was. What she said stuck with me mentally for another mile or so. I worked hard to just stay focused at this point. The muscles in my quads started to feel achy and I feared a similar situation to Grandma’s with my the cramping would start to come up. The humidity was also getting to me. I was soaked from sweat and dumping water on my head to cool down.
Towards the end of mile 22 is where it started to unravel. I could hear spectators cheering loudly just after I passed and this usually signals a pace group is coming. As I progressed, the spectators started yelling, “Let’s go 3 hour group!” and I felt this impending doom settle over me. They were right on my heels and this is everyone’s worst nightmare - seeing the pace group you want to be in front of not only catch you, but pass you. They sort of surrounded me, and I tried so hard to tuck in and stay with them. I couldn’t have spoken if I wanted too, but I was begging them to stay with me. Slowly they started to drift away and then they were gone.
At this point, I had stopped looking at my watch because I knew that it would only discourage me further to see anything above a 7 minute mile. I just focused on getting through each mile, but I started thinking, “Why am I doing this? Why is this even important to me? So many people are going to be disappointed.” I couldn’t stop. I felt like it was taking everything in my being to not walk. I still knew I could PR, but I wasn’t sure by how much because I literally was unwilling to look at my watch.
I finally saw Capitol Park and knew that there were just a couple more turns until the finish. I saw the marker indicating 400 meters left and was still thinking the 3:05 group might come up on me at any point because I had slowed so much. I made the final turn into the finish shoot and saw a 3:01:xx on the clock. I can’t really tell you exactly what that felt like, but extreme sadness/disappointment and also pride that I hadn’t fallen off as much as I thought I did. Once I crossed and stopped my watch and looked at my time seeing a 3:01:24, I was a little angry at myself for not being able to stick with it. For being so close and yet so far from my goal.
After crossing the finish I started crying and then found my parents and Ricky asap because I needed to cry into someone’s shoulder! The first thing I said to them was, “I don’t ever want to do this again.” Dramatic, yes. I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve said that following a marathon. I was just so distraught at the fact that everything says I can run faster than 3 hours, but I broke somewhere in those last 5 miles. Do I really have it in me to get this goal?? Sharing my splits below so you can see where I really fell off during those last 5 miles.
I didn’t have a ton of time to be sad because I knew Katherine and Natalie would be coming through any second. They were shooting sub 3:10, and both came in at 3:07! Huge PRs for both of them. I couldn’t be more happy to celebrate their accomplishment and when I told Nat my time, she was soooo happy for me that I realized I should be happy with that too. A PR is a good day. It snapped me out of it, but still I felt this mix of pride and disappointment. And just a little bit of fatigue at the fact that I gotta do this at least one more time. There’s nothing in me that wants to stop running marathons, but I also know that it takes so much from me and that leaves me feeling empty at times.
After the race, Ricky and I spent the week in Oregon, road tripping around from Portland down through the Willamette Valley and then up the coast to celebrate our 1 year anniversary (and I was hoping to celebrate a sub 3, but celebrating a PR is good enough for me!) and the trip helped me recover mentally. It was the perfect end to one of the hardest and most rewarding training cycles I’ve had to date. I have no races on the calendar for 2020 yet, but I’m excited to see what this year holds. And you can bet that I will be chasing a sub 3 again.
If you’d like to watch my recap video sharing more about how I feel about the results, check it out below! Thank you all for your endless support. It means everything to me.
J
